(Click here for a subtitled version)
I'm back on eHarmony. I'm weak, don't judge me. I got suckered in by the free weekend and before I knew it, I had signed up for a three-month membership. Whoops.
I keep going back and forth, though, over whether to mention my hearing loss on my profile. On one hand, I want to be upfront so that there are no surprises. You know, if someone kept something like that from me until we'd exchanged several emails, I think I would wonder what else they might not be telling me. I don't want to appear deceptive. On the other hand, sharing that kind of information is pretty personal and I'd rather someone got to know me as a person (and me get to know them better) before divulging my hearing loss. Hearing loss is easy to misunderstand and I wouldn't want someone to see "hard of hearing" in my profile and run the opposite direction because they think it is something scary and foreign.
I also wonder how a relationship works if one person can hear and the other is hard of hearing. Would my friends who are hard of hearing with hearing spouses/significant others chime in here? In my more melodramatic moments, I'm convinced that NO ONE will ever GET me if they are not hard of hearing themselves and in my more mellow moments, I remind myself that I'm a person first, and that personality and heart trump hearing loss... I think?
Talk to me. What are your thoughts or experiences on being in a relationship when you are hard of hearing?
I posted this a while ago, but I think it's worth sharing again... I hope it makes you smile!
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I have to be honest. Don't worry about mentioning it in your profile. It doesn't matter. The people to whom it matters, don't matter anyway. Also, a prospective date probably won't notice; it isn't on their mind. You are great at lip-reading, so the conversation will be pretty fluent in any environment, loud or quiet. And think of it this way: they are just hearing aids. Think of the number of prospective dates that wear glasses. Do they mention it in their profile? No. They need assistance and you need assistance, but that's life in the big top. Disclosure: I wear hearing aids in both ears, began to lose my hearing in '89. You know, if you are barely conscious of your hearing aids, your date will be barely conscious of them, too.
ReplyDeleteOn another note, I love your blog. It is a swell idea.
Whatever your decision is, I still admire how you cope with this. People can have a lot of things in their mind and they do everything to help themselves realize what’s best and what they need to do or not. I guess that video in the end helped you think… It’s really worth sharing! Thanks!
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